Lights, Camera, Action!

Top Ten Tuesday

Top Ten Books That I Wouldn’t Necessarily Object To Seeing As Movies/TV Shows

Let’s see how I go with this one, as I am a firm believer in the separation of books and visual media, and don’t generally like adaptations (what with being grumpy and old). Prompt from the Broke and the Bookish.

1. Pride and Prejudice and Zombies by Jane Austen and Seth Grahame-Smith

Ok, I’m cheating as apparently this movie has finally been made (last I heard they were still trying to bribe Natalie Portman to star). It will probably be a total mess, but then so was the one with Keira Knightley and at least this one will have zombies.

2. Annihilation by Jeff Vandemeer

Cheating again, as this is rumoured to be in the works (possibly starring Natalie Portman, because apparently she is haunting me). I would see this movie but I would probably hate it. It’s the only Vandermeer book that I’ve read that I can see possibly working on the screen, but only if they stick to Annihilation and don’t try to cram the rest of the trilogy in (which I’m sure they will do, which will ruin it). Like I’ve mentioned elsewhereAnnihilation can stand alone and in the case of an adaptation, should stand alone.

3. Discworld books by Terry Pratchett

But not those awful live action ones that all seem to star David Jason for some reason (does he own the rights or something?!). I want more of the animated tv series of which only two (as far as I’m aware) were made, Wyrd Sisters and Soul Music. Christopher Lee is the voice of Death, it couldn’t be more perfect.

4. The City and the City by China Miéville

Eh, it probably wouldn’t work but the visuals of two cities juxtaposed could be amazing. It does bear similarities to what I know of series like The Bridge and The Tunnel, where two investigative jurisdictions overlap and come into conflict.

5. A Dr. Seuss Horror Movie

Maybe Green Eggs and Ham?

6. Pagan’s Crusade by Catherine Jinks

Liam Neeson as Lord Roland, and I’m sold. I think he’s probably a bit old these days, but as long as channelled Qui-Gon Jinn he could get away with it.

7. The Eyre Affair by Jasper Fforde

One of those that could go either way, as long as they made a sensible choice for Thursday and didn’t try to dumb it down too much (more literary references are better than less) it could work.

8. Something Lovecraftian

At the Mountains of Madness fell apart, but I would only trust Guillermo del Toro to pull off a Lovecraft story. In related news, how good does Crimson Peak look?!

9. The Obernewtyn Chronicles by Isobelle Carmody

I haven’t read anything past The Keeping Place, but there’s Hunger Games-esque, post-apocalyptic, don’t-trust-the-adults type themes that might translate well to a YA movie series.

10. The Black Swan by Mercedes Lackey

In complete opposition to the other books on this list, I want this to be made into a movie that TOTALLY GUTS THE BOOK. Rip it apart, rewrite it, do whatever you have to. I recently re-read this book and was horrified to realise that younger me had totally blocked out the fact that Prince Siegfried (Prince Charming essentially, the one who is going to marry Odette) is a rapist. A rapist who is not punished by anything other than a few bad dreams. Make the movie, keep Odile and Odette as the main characters but a) make Prince Siegfried something other than a selfish, useless rapist or b) make the prince back-up bad guy, who gets kicked to the kerb by Odette when she finds out how awful he is.

Bonus Round: Stop It. Stop It Now.

1. The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern

Yes, if the movie was done properly it would be amazing. But it won’t be. It will be wall-to-wall CGI. It will probably be in 3D. Tim Burton will probably get his grubby mitts on it, and then it’s only a short step to Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter chewing the scenery. The main cast will be ‘bankable’ ‘stars’. There is an IMDb page where the forums are full of people suggesting dream casts and someone suggested Robert Downey Jr. and I was so horrified that I had to stop reading. It might make a very sweet stop motion or hand drawn animation, but live action fills me with fear.

2. ‘Classic’ Novels

Pride and PrejudiceVanity FairGreat ExpectationsBleak HouseGormenghastThe Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, all these books have one thing in common: a perfectly good mini series which has already been made. Even a mini series needs to cut things out, but nowhere near as much as a movie does. Pack it in with the remakes already.

3. Movies That Split One Book Into Two Movies

The Hunger GamesHarry Potter and The Hobbit all did this and you know what? I haven’t seen the last movie of any of them. Ha! Take that money grubbing movie studios! I know how they end, I read the book (well, not The Hobbit, but everyone knows what happens to Smaug).

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4 thoughts on “Lights, Camera, Action!

  1. I am actually looking forward to Pride Prejudice and Zombies (then again I have zero emotional attachment to the original book), but I would have been happier with a Jane Austen Fight Club movie 😀 (the fake trailer was epic).
    Also, Christopher Lee in Soul Music. SO MUCH YES.

    @TarkabarkaHolgy from
    Multicolored Diary

  2. Pingback: I Prefer To Be Surprised | legolegislegimus

  3. Pingback: Fairytales | legolegislegimus

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